A Shocking Scene at Shirring Trivia

Writing the poem

It took about 5 months to write the story, but it took nearly two more months to settle on a title (which was suggested by editing partner Dr. Larry Kauffman).
This poem proved even more difficult to write than “Penelope Piper” due to the alternation between “S” and “Sh” words (or words that start with the same sound), the latter of which are very limited. Merriam Webster lists few than 300 common words beginning with “Sh,” most of which were unusable in this context. Fortunately, the options are expended slightly by including other letter combinations pronounced like “Sh,” including “Su” as in “sugar,” “Ssu” as in “assure,” “Ch” as in “chauffeur,” “Si” as in “expansion,” “Ssi” as in “mission,” “Ti” as in “station,” and “Ci” as in “social.”
This variety of tongue twister is particularly difficult to say because of our natural propensity to switch the “S” and “Sh” sounds when they are placed close together. Careful consideration had to be given to ensure that no accidental swearing would be caused; therefore, the author could not use any words with the sound “sit” in them, such as “situation,” “solicit,” and “city.”
The meter was regularly tested against two songs: “Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious” from Mary Poppins and “I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General” from The Pirates of Penzance, both of which use an iambic meter in the lyrics.
The Sergeant was originally named “Simon Schlosser,” where the “Sch” is pronounced like “Sh,” but the name was scrapped to avoid the possibility of the surname being pronounced like “Sklosser” which would have resulted in two “S” words back-to-back.
The author kept lists of potentially usable words starting with both the “S” and “Sh” sounds as well as a special subset list containing words that started with the “S” sound and ended in the “-tion” sound.
Running out of “Sh” options resulted in reading the entire “Sh” section of the dictionary, where Karen learned the word shoat which became part of the newspaper company’s name.
Other crimes considered for Sergeant Slasher’s department were shoplifting, stealing, and shooting.
The original plan for Slasher’s discovery of Sheldon’s identity was for him to inquire about Sheldon’s relationship to Charlotte (spouse? sibling? son?), but the words wouldn’t cooperate, so the idea was replaced with Charlotte making her concerning comment about a younger Sheldon swimming near ships.
Sheldon is a seal (because it’s more familiar and easier to fit in the poem), but Sheila is a sea lion (because they are actually trainable for circus performance). Sheila is never referred to as a seal, though her shadow is referred to as “seal-shaped.”
Ending a story well is very difficult. It took almost 2 months to write the last two stanzas, partly due to life circumstances and partly due to the difficulty of deciding the ending and making it fit in the “S”-“Sh” parameters.
Several news-related terms were considered in the naming of the newspaper along with the words that could be used to rhyme with them, including “times” (with “crimes”), “post” (with “most”), “news” (with “choose,” “accuse,” “defuse,” or “abuse”), and “press” (with “guess,” “stress,” “address,” “confess,” or “success”).

Illustrating the story

Sergeant Slasher is the head of all things “drama” at the police station. He is officially head of “scandals, shams, and slander,” but also starred in the station’s musical, a photo of which can be seen on the wall.
The balancing act equipment was inspired by the performing team Circus Incredible which the author saw at a local fair.
The steaming mug in Sheldon’s study is modeled after the illustrator’s favorite mug.
About 50 items were considered for Charlotte’s quirky earrings, including pretzels, skunks, sombreros, fire hydrants, crutches, toast, dumpsters, and ceiling fans. The guidelines defined by the author were that it could not be 1. an object that is generally considered beautiful, 2. an obvious hobby item (such as a musical instrument or piece of sporting equipment), 3. creepy or gross, and 4. an obvious holiday item (such as a shamrock or Christmas wreath). The goal was to find mundane things that would not make sense apart from Charlotte simply liking them.